Punitive Skepsis

Hey, you. Come here. I have to get this off my chest. Ok, so, I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no fucking way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why isn't notebook paper constantly suffocating students while they take notes in class? I'll tell you why: because paper can't beat anybody; a rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/paper/scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to beat me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, "Oh shit, I'm sorry. I thought paper would protect you, you asshole!"

Ugh, now that we got that out of the way.... Time for my bio!

But there's only one teeeensy problemo..

If I tell you, then I'd have to kill you. *tsk* Reality is unfair.

But my keyword: AWESOME

"Life is much like a song. In the beginning there is a mystery, in the end there is confirmation, but its in the middle where all the emotion resides to make the whole thing worthwhile."

"My thoughts tend to sound better in books i didn't write and songs i didn't sing. even then, sometimes there is no piece of literature, no song, no work of art that can really explain how you feel. there is the double-edge comfort in knowing that no one really knows."