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Halfway Between The Gutter And The Stars

 The Gutter ― http://www.halfwaybetweenthegutter.wordpress.com

Experiences of the mental health system and life, as seen through the eyes of a certified crazy twenty-something. An outlet for thoughts and feelings, bad poetry, blurry photographs and emotional outbursts.

Avg. Rating: 3.8 out of 5.0 ∙ 2 Reviews ∙ 22 Followers

Listed: Oct 25, 2011

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My bed feels larger than when I was small

My bed feels larger than when I was small

Halfway Between The Gutter And The Stars ― I’m tired of struggling through every day. Of pushing and pulling and forcing myself to at least seem okay. I’m tired of speaking and having the words come out jumbled before they can even leave my mouth. Of sleeping only when beyond...

Tags: Every Day Life, Calorie Counting, Depression, ED, Facebook, Family

The Gutter ― 1 week 5 days ago

Wrong way on a one way track

Wrong way on a one way track

Halfway Between The Gutter And The Stars ― “Can you help me remember how to smile, make it somehow all seem worthwhile? How on earth did I get so jaded?“ Depression is a cruel, cruel illness. It robs you of the ability to give a damn. I find it incredibly difficult to write ...

Tags: Every Day Life, Addiction, Ankle, Chronic Pain, Codeine, Depression

The Gutter ― 3 weeks 1 day ago

It demands to be felt.

It demands to be felt.

Halfway Between The Gutter And The Stars ― I spent some time last night reading through a few of my old posts. Recently, I’ve become incredibly bitter about my situation, and part of that bitterness is centered around my inability to write properly now. Writing has always been my way ...

Tags: Every Day Life, Ankle, Health, Orthopedic Surgery, Pain

The Gutter ― 6 weeks ago

These wounds are all self-imposed

These wounds are all self-imposed

Halfway Between The Gutter And The Stars ― I fell apart yesterday. In hindsight, it was coming; there’s only so long I can keep things secret before I blow, and I just couldn’t keep it in anymore. I cried all day. I don’t think I’ve ever cried so much. I’m not...

Tags: Every Day Life, Antidepressant, Anxiety Disorder, Attention Seeking, Cipralex, Crying

The Gutter ― 6 weeks 4 days ago

There and back again

There and back again

Halfway Between The Gutter And The Stars ― During my brief* flirtation with cognitive behavioural therapy, I found my first stumbling block to be the advice I was given to follow when I’m having a panic attack: “Remember, it won’t kill you“. Really? Because...

Tags: Every Day Life, Addiction, Anxiety, Panic, Panic Attack, Tramadol

The Gutter ― 7 weeks ago

So why don’t you slide

So why don’t you slide

Halfway Between The Gutter And The Stars ― Earlier, S asked if I fancied a takeaway – curry from our favourite restaurant – and I agreed. Later he went out with a friend to buy some tools. They’re working on the basement beneath our flat, as technically that’s ...

Tags: Every Day Life, Addiction, Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD, Drugs, Fear

The Gutter ― 7 weeks 1 day ago

There is a light that never goes out

There is a light that never goes out

Halfway Between The Gutter And The Stars ― When I lived with my mother, there were often times when the only source of entertainment was to write. There are only so many cheap horror films someone can watch before they all drift into one, and only so many charity shop books you can buy ...

Tags: Every Day Life, Addiction, Arthritis, Consultant, Health, Musculoskeletal Disorders

The Gutter ― 8 weeks 2 days ago

A letter to my consultant

Halfway Between The Gutter And The Stars ― Current medications: Propranalol Hydrochloride (80mg daily) – for anxiety and panic attacks Lansoprazole (30mg daily) Etoricoxib (60mg daily) – for inflammation Pregabalin (300mg daily) – for fibromyalgia Duloxetine (90mg daily) ...

Tags: Every Day Life, Anxiety, BPD, Chronic Pain, Coldsores, Conditions And Diseases

The Gutter ― 8 weeks 5 days ago

My little empire.

Halfway Between The Gutter And The Stars ― “My little empire I’m sick of being sick My little empire I’m tired of being tired” Related articles Coping with chronic pain (blogpackinglight.wordpress.com) Letter to People WITHOUT Chronic Pain...

Tags: Every Day Life, Chronic Illness, Depression, Fibromyalgia, Health, Lyrics

The Gutter ― 13 weeks ago

“Well, I had no confidence in my ability to dent another human’s life”

“Well, I had no confidence in my ability to dent another human’s life”

Halfway Between The Gutter And The Stars ― Sometimes it’s impossible to even think of a title to a post, let alone which words to use. Being stoned doesn’t help, but it’s the only way I’ve been able to cope today; it was either dope, or masses of co-codamol and a ...

Tags: Every Day Life, Addiction, Co-codamol, Disability, Drugs, Exercise

The Gutter ― 13 weeks ago

The fight never seems to end

The fight never seems to end

Halfway Between The Gutter And The Stars ― Life is good. It is also equally bad. It’s strange to feel this way; things have always tended towards the negative, and so far my life has mostly been 95% bad, 5% good… and it hasn’t been rare to be trapped in a cycle of 0% ...

Tags: Every Day Life, Borderline Personality Disorder, Duloxetine, Fibro, Fibromyalgia, Flare

The Gutter ― 14 weeks ago

My study

My study

Halfway Between The Gutter And The Stars ― Filed under: Every day life, Photographs Tagged: books, desk, knitting, study, the flat

Tags: Every Day Life, Photographs, Books, Desk, Knitting, Study

The Gutter ― 14 weeks ago

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