Mehers ∙ 16 Jan, 10
yeah acceptance is unconditional.many fat ppls have a big social circle.
DOn't think that way.
People will accept you if they learn to know you well. Acceptance is unconditional.
Build a stronger confidence wthin you.
Being fat and slim really don't mean much. Remember Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What one may think is hot, another may think other wise. At the end of the day the only person who matters is you. So learn to love yourself and others will also.
i strongly agree on d last 2nd line.."at the end of the day, it's only you that matters" :)
Right! Thumbs up :D
Don't worry so much about your appearance. No matter what you look like you always get criticized. That's just the way life is unfortunately.
Society has been raised to think that beauty means "thin and muscle." It's a shallow way to live and think.
You're human just like everyone else. Be confident in yourself, learn to be comfortable in your own skin, and other people will accept you.
Not everyone is going to accept you for who you are whether it's your appearance or personality. For example, I have a pretty abrasive personality that not everyone can tolerate or handle. But I do have a circle of close friends that can tolerate my company just fine. You can't please all the people all the time. There's no need to question yourself over it. Just think of it this way - It's not you, it's them. :o)
Even the slim are lonely. Physical size does not matter in respect of inter relationships. How one feels of self and others, matter the most. Only those who like themselves first, can like the others as well. In life "NO ONE PERSON is ever acceptable by ALL PERSONS. Eventually it is a group of likes and dislikes getting together. Forget the size issue and move into groups of similar likes, hopes and interests.
no.unless you want to fit in badly.if you cant be thr trend set the trend.you honesty dont need to please the world.you can be model slim and if your not comfy in your own shoe.not even a supermodel size will help you ft in anywhere.
People who dont like you 4 who u r, are people u dont wanna hang around. People like that arent real friends. There's absoultly nothing wrong wit u:) People who think their is a prblem, need to get their heads out of their ass and accept u for who u are, not wat u look like.
im super slim, and i don't care what other say, if you are really a good person, no matter how you looks, it's just inside you always shine in other's eyes..
Blame it on pop culture.. all these magazines.
It's crazy how you buy a food magazine with
all the deserts and sweets in the cover,
then when you open it, it's all these diet pills
and slim women. It's giving the readers mixed
When you watch TV, all you see are all these
celebrities and their super slim bodies.
People will always judge you regardless.
You cannot please everyone.
If you are slim, they'll say you are bulimic,
or you have an eating disorder. Same thing.
I agree with all these people who have commented
before me. Its useless to even question yourself
over it. :)
you are who you are girl! unique in many ways. you don't need to starve yourself in order to be accepted in the society. Don't try to please the people that surrounds you. Remember that: "Beauty is always found from within."
xactly........i agree wit ur comment........gr8...! realy corect...!
Sadly we live in a world that is overly concerned with artificial norms, norms that imposed by society and it's many mechanism of socialization.
It's all over TV and movies, in every magazine you read. But in the end the people who really matter are the people who are not bound by these artificial ideals.
Seek out and seek to be like the people who live "outside the box". The ones who are not bound by worrying what other people think. These people will embrace you for the good person you are, no matter what the package looks like. They know the gift is on the inside.
before thinking about or worrying about others opinion try looking at yourself in the mirror and say..."ganda mo ngayun! lov it" or "pretty pretty me! mwah mwah mwah" hehehe like the person that u are seeing in the mirror rather than thnking about what others think about u.. the important thing is the way u look at urself my dear.. im also so on the heavy side hehe and im loving it! take care
The idea is not bad if you link it with health and fitness.Social acceptance shoul be a bonus not the goal
thank you very much for your advises,.. i think i have benn in the wrong circles of people that judge me of my appearance. i truly apreciate it :)
they're not helping you to become a better person. very disappointing.
whether you like it or not, it's the appearance of the person that is firstly seen.. it's just too frustrating sometimes that we seem unacceptable just because of the way we look.
anyway, just don't be bothered so much with it.. A friend once shared this:
"CARRY YOURSELF IN SUCH A WAY THAT WHEN PEOPLE ARE SITTING, YOU WOULD BE STANDING..
AND WHEN THEY ARE STANDING, YOU WILL STAND OUT..
AND WHEN THEY STAND OUT, YOU WILL BE OUTSTANDING..
AND WHEN THEY DARE TO BE OUTSTANDING, YOU WILL BE THEIR STANDARD"
just be optimistic.. it's just a matter of self valuing..:)
Excellent words Cissydette! Love it!
One easy way to achieve all of them: Be you, what you are- when you know better- people will notice you better.
Beautiful ~ Love this!
Yes dear! Yes dear! We are unique. And we are not OBLIGED to impress others. :)Long as we don't step on others' foot then you're cool!
unfortunately the society is very shallow minded as a whole and judges people from petty things like physical appearences. 'fat' and 'thin' are not just words; they're literally basis for discrimination.
I want to wish you all the best in life and hopefully your inner strength and beauty will take you much farther than any other 'thin' person out there! :)
I don't know whether people treat you differently because you are fat, but I am sure people treat you differently when you have more confidence and accept yourself the way you are!
well I am fat as well and not a good looking fellow.. but I have a big circle of friends. so you are wrong dont worry as the previous comment says at the end of the day it's you that matters.
My dear Master Pooh,
My prime advise is to take extra care of your health. Your physical size not a big isue but, do matter if it were not fit or healthy. Now you may decide not to bother on what people says about you... But you MUST do care your health status for your sake.
Enjoy your day and good luck.
Its not about accepting!Its about choice of life!If U feel happy to be the person U are!Why do U care about what and how they feel!Its your life,choice is always yours!So just smile and tell,''I'm fat and feeling just great!" I'm sure you can win all of them!
There are certainly people who base things on physical appearence and popular culture give the presception, but the people who really matter are the ones who are into all facets of you. It's always the layers below that are the best ones.
Your obesity is not the reason of other people not accepting you there may be any other thing you need to know or may be your are super sensitive to feel that.
But other than people acceptance you need to reduce your weight for your health and long life as obesity do reduce your life span and increase danger level for you. plz do reduce your weight you will yourself feel good.
i am going to add a new post on my blog that how to i reduce my weight plz check that it can be helpful for you.
IMP: WHERE PEOPLE ARE NOT ACCEPTING YOU I ACCEPT YOU AS MY FRIEND WILL YOU ACCEPT MY FRIENDSHIP AND I CAN DO HELP YOU MAKE ACCEPTABLE EVEN MORE THAN ACCEPTABLE FOR THE WORLD...........I CAN BEAT THAT PEOPLE IGNORING YOU RITE NOW WILL BE BEHIND YOU TO BE YOUR FRIEND, WILL REALLY VALUE YOU. I MYSELF HAVE GONE THROUGH ALL THIS AND NOW I CAN LET YOU AND MANY OTHERS LIKE YOU OUT OF THIS.
I think all people are equal and that they shouldn't be divided in any way, especially not based on looks. It's shallow.
this is true but also highly unrealistic... n thats just the way the world is.. appearance is everything these days... the things we can change like our clothes or our hairstyle to the things we can't change like our skin color or what country we come from is judged at every moment of our lives.. its truly sad but what can we do about it...?
Do i really have to be slim and fit to be accepted in the society?
ABSOLUTELY NOT! What you DO have to be is okay with you and who you are. You have to be happy with yourself. Love who you are and every bit of it! You will find those true friends that love you for you and those are the ones that you want to surround yourself with.
Its unfair but it'll be a lie to say that boundaries don't exist at all. It depends on where you live.
Its why racism is strong in some places and not in others. If you live in an area where there are a lot of fat people, it becomes a norm and you'll be accepted more easily. If you go to vietnam, you'll hard see any fat people. I have been there at least 5 times and have yet to see 1 fat person. I'm not joking.
You can observe this amongst animals as well. That's what we call natural selection. This is why elephants with big tusks are preferred as mates.
I suggest you either start working out (its better for health too) or hang with others who accept it.
There are always different types of peoples and thoughts process must be different too .to be very practical with you ,good looking people accepted in every field ,if you are feeling this types of behavior for you then yes this right time to shock them -you can use it for slimming body - http://www.aaateleshoping.in/Health_and_Fitness/Sauna_Belt/
@Beautykillz You are right about reality, but that reality was created by people and also accepted by people. Whole that environment made our world look really superficial and we started to notice only appearance and not content. That can't be good.
You just have to love yourself first before having to desire being loved and accepted by others,too.
Hi friend , this is aceumbrella.com. i think being beautiful ,fit , slim and elegant would be accepted by the society easily , right ?
Who needs acceptance from society. I was fat once. I'm in rather great shape now. Nothings really changed except every once in a while I'll get the attention of someone I didn't want.
yea every one can smart just little effort can make u smart,dnt leave eating but choose to eat some thing which not increase weight.
if ppl cant accept you for who you are they are not true friends! some ppl in the world are just mean for no reason!!
started a new fitness blog! it is my passion so please show me some love!!
Be who you are.Do what you want to do.Because you are never good enough for the world.Letting people influence your decisions will only ruin your experience.
But trying to slim down for your own health is wise.One must always try to do what;s right.
And this comes from someone who spends each day making people fitter & healthier
Strong is the New Skinny
it does not matter what size are you, the best thing is you are good person to others and being yourself makes everything in comfort.
in the Philippines, if you're fat for sure you'll be bullied and discriminated especially if you don't have enough confidence within you. That's what happened to me in my entire high school life. But now that I'm in college, I started to show people around me that my size didn't affect my ranking in school, and I always show them that even if that I'm fat and ugly to their eyes, I can still be better than them academically.
Have confidence in yourself and hold your head up high because you're beautiful just the way you are. =D
well, I don't know what exact criteria on this but, I am very slim person and I try to put on some weight , being fat or thin doesnt matter I think , what really matter is that are you accepting yourself as the way you are ? without loving yourself , accepting and embracing yourself, no one gonna love you and in any society you would get a chance of being accepted.
Master Pooh, to answer your topic (which is your main question) - No, you don't have to be slim and fit to be accepted in the society. I am also a victim of scorn and ridicule in school because I was chubby but I proved to them that I have something else to offer and not to be judged by how I look. I excelled in school and I did my best to be friends to everyone I meet. You cannot please everybody so don't try to. But do your best to be who you are. Excel in the field you love the most for example, writing or singing. One way or another people will accept you for who you are as a person not just on how you look. And if it also helps boost your confidence, losing weight is an option (and also good for one's health) but it isn't the ONLY answer to being accepted in the society.
I agree with you Kcfowler.. nice thought.
Nope, everyone has their own troubles, slim or not. Trust me also slim people have troubles with other people and often are missjudged. Just like you do. We people are really mean towards each other and we're mean to all. We always find something to pick on. ;) So just be yourself and if you have troubles with someone don't care about it because nobody is perfect, especially the one who finds something wrong in you!
If you're unhappy, get active. Change it. But if you're going to do it: do it for *yourself*. No one should ever feel pressured to look or act a certain way because then it's dishonest and you still wouldn't be happy.
There's nothing wrong with your appearance - it's society that has the problem. Would you believe back in the 50-60s there were adverts saying if you we're slim, you were ugly? How times have changed. This also proves it is just a problem with people, and you need to learn to love yourself despite all this. :)
I think they already said it all the advices that you need. I have a different view though. I hope that this isn't one of those cry. You sound like you needed people to comfort you though you already know that people will sympathize with you.
What I mean is, the problem is your self esteem not your body. The comfort that you get from people that tell you otherwise pick you up though after a while, it will go back to the same cycle.
Have you ever tried to see it in that perspective too?
Anyways, I might be offending a few people already or even you, I maybe coming out strong but it wasn't my intention. It's just something you might also consider.
All the best
People who judge others on appearances only are superficial, and you know what, their loss!! But also remember, your attitude determines how people respond to you. Let me give you an amazing example, I used to work for this women quite a few years ago, she's a size 42, that is a South-Africa size but it is quite a large size, and she struggled with her tummy which as she described it it's not my words, as an extra tyre. She was so vivacious, she drew people to her, she wore beautiful clothing and wasn't afraid to wear pencil skirts and dresses which was form fitting but extremely flattering ... her personality made her beautiful, she was beautiful, her hair was cut in this stunning a-line bob, amazing make-up! What I'm trying to say is, love and accept yourself first, because if you had true self-confidence in who you are, I doubt you'd have these feelings.
“To all the girls that think you’re fat because you’re not a size zero, you’re the beautiful one, its society who’s ugly.” Marilyn Monroe
I believe that if you accept yourself by who you are, not by how you look, everyone else will do the same: it is a question of confidence and attitude!
To be honest, the answer is simple...One should never be judged by their weight. I have tons of friends that are just that, and they're actually easier to get along with than most.
I've always been into fitness though, for myself mainly. My health is what comes first. That's just me, and some frown upon that.
So don't worry about it. If people are too closed minded to see you for who you are, fuck 'em. That's my two cents worth..:)
Sent you a FR by the way.