Pressure, I feel pressure, pressured that tomorrow may never come, pressured that my days are numbered, that I might snap one day and end everything and everything that happened until then was all for nothing. It's hard, it's depressing and still it can get a lot harder, a lot more depressing, a lot worse. We know that we can't control everything, and yet there a lot of things we can control, but I feel like there are very few things, not to say that there are none, that I can control. I can control when I eat, I can't control how much I eat, not that I have an uncontrollable compulsive need to eat, but because there are very few things I find in the fridge, and that's not even we are poor, we're not, but because there isn't a "we" anymore, my family has completely disintegrated and it's started a long time ago, way before I could do anything. My family is one those families where opinions are not needed or respected for that matter, a family where the members don't treat each other as equals, where there is a constant fight for a place in hierarchy, a family where there is too much, way too much left unsaid, unspoken that adds tremendously to the pressure you feel inside, and maybe I should speak for myself.
Full article find at http://genutsu.blogspot.com/2012/08/pressure.html
Any commentaries are very much welcomed.