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Funny Facebook Quotes

71 Funny Quotes

71 Funny Quotes

Quotes And status ― _______Listen...I need to know, who is spreading the word on how awesome I am? (Being awesome quote) ∙ _______Wonder which one of my rich friends in here are willing to send me some money.......I'm broke!! (money borrow quote) ∙...

Tags: Drunk Quotes, Funny Facebook Quotes, Funny Depression Quotes, Funny Superman Quotes, Funny Love Quote, Short Jokes

Michal Schofield ― 37 weeks ago

57 Funny Quotes

57 Funny Quotes

Quotes And status ― _____"THIS IS THE POLICE, OPEN THE DOOR"...not with that attitude I won't (funny cops quote)_____A friend of my was recently hacked...It was sad seeing her head roll down the street. (hacking quote status)_____Sometimes you guys don't know when my...

Tags: Funny Facebook Quotes, Funny Cops Quotes, Short Jokes, Famous Funny Quotes, Funny Monday Quotes, Funny Inspirational Quotes

Michal Schofield ― 49 weeks ago

44 Funny Quotes

44 Funny Quotes

Quotes And status ― _____I was thinking about when I met my wife. I'll never forget the first thing she ever said to me. " Stop following me, you f**king freak!!!" (short joke)_____I poked your mom today. Then I logged on to Facebook (funny facebook quote...

Tags: Funny Lotto Quotes, Funny Facebook Quotes, Hilarious Quotes, Funny Dream Quotes, Funny Barbra Walters, Funny Facebook Status

Michal Schofield ― 6 May, 12

43 Funny Quotes

43 Funny Quotes

Quotes And status ― _____I don't get why my friend keeps talking about his "Trophy Wife". "Honorable Mention Wife" at best I think. ∙ _____I tried to express my feelings with dance moves but no one understood me. Next time I will hire an interpreter ∙...

Tags: LOL Quotes, Funny Stripper Quotes, Funny Facebook Quotes, Funny NASCAR Quotes, Bipolar Quotes, How I Met Your Mother

Michal Schofield ― 4 May, 12

42 Funny Quotes

42 Funny Quotes

Quotes And status ― _____If your lover makes you an option in their life instead of a priority, it's time to consider other options. (funny love quote)_____I would give more homeless people money but I'm always worried he'll just go blow it on sharpies and cardboard ...

Tags: Witty Quotes, Funny Sandwich Quotes, Funny Facebook Quotes, Funny Love Quote, Short Jokes, Funny Economy Quotes

Michal Schofield ― 3 May, 12

31 Funny Quotes

31 Funny Quotes

Quotes And status ― _____ Taking an extended break from Facebook. Be back in 15 minutes (Facebook addiction quote) ∙ _____ I'm not a fan. Or a heater, or any other appliance, but DEFINITELY not a fan ∙ _____I'm sorry, but the amount of alcohol I would...

Tags: Funny Facebook Quotes, Short Jokes, Funny Twitter Quotes, Funny Boyfriend Quotes, Funny President Quotes, Funny Facebook Status

Michal Schofield ― 4 Apr, 12

25 Funny Quotes

25 Funny Quotes

Quotes And status ― ____To stay as my kids leading role model, I changed the covers of their "Superheros" comic books, to pics of ME with the title of, "below average and happy" ∙ _____Life's all about knowing how long to wait before liking someone's new ...

Tags: Witty Quotes, Happiness Quotes, Funny Facebook Quotes, Funny Jokes, Funny Quotes For The Day, Short Jokes

Michal Schofield ― 2 Apr, 12

23 Funny Quotes

Quotes And status ― _____There's no feeling better that this warm air coming from your laptop on your crotch in this freaking cold weather. (funny winter quote) ∙ _____I type my statuses slowly, so that some of you can understand them. (funny Facebook status)...

Tags: Happiness Quotes, Funny Facebook Quotes, Hilarious Quotes, Funny Jokes, Funny Quotes For The Day, Best Funny Quotes

Michal Schofield ― 2 Apr, 12

22 Funny Quotes

22 Funny Quotes

Quotes And status ― ____I listen to stranger's conversations and give my opinion... "does this dress make my butt look big?" "no but your butt makes that dress look big!" (best funny quote, status, joke) ∙ _____Forget about wanting a *dislike* button added to...

Tags: Funny Facebook Quotes, Hilarious Quotes, Funny Jokes, Hilarious Status, Funny Quotes For The Day, Best Funny Quotes

Michal Schofield ― 2 Apr, 12

21 Funny Quotes

21 Funny Quotes

Quotes And status ― ____The probability of me having a Good Night is equal to the probability of you wishing me a Good Night.. (funny quote) ∙ _____I don't care to date the most beautiful woman in the world.. I want the woman who makes the world the most...

Tags: Witty Quotes, Funny Facebook Quotes, Top Funny Quotes, Hilarious Quotes, Funny Jokes, Hilarious Status

Michal Schofield ― 2 Apr, 12

20 Funny Quotes

20 Funny Quotes

Quotes And status ― ____I'm so hot while cleaning the house I make the floor wet. (funny quote, funny status) ∙ ____Its 2:30 you know what that means? That's right... Its no longer 2:29...... (funny time quote, short joke) ∙ _____I did everything on my ...

Tags: Funny Facebook Quotes, Hilarious Quotes, Funny Jokes, Hilarious Status, Best Funny Quotes, Funny Status

Michal Schofield ― 2 Apr, 12

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