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This Stepford Life

fiery death chicken

Delicious Juice Dot Com ― I can cook. While I’ll never open my own restaurant or be TV pretty (an apparent requirement of anyone who can cook these days), I can make a decent, filling meal that probably won’t kill you. I don’t cook fancy – I see no...

Tags: This Stepford Life, Cooking Fail, Death Chicken, Jerk Sauce, Morning Wood

Kimli ― 2 hr ago

jesus loves me, this i know

jesus loves me, this i know

Delicious Juice Dot Com ― .. because my birthday card tells me so? Thanks, Ed. I think.

Tags: This Stepford Life, Anal Sex, Birthday, Bukkake, Strap-on, These Are A Few Of My Favourite Things

Kimli ― 1 day ago

we could be heroes

Delicious Juice Dot Com ― There’s a bus shelter I pass on my way to work, advertising an upcoming season of Local Sports Ball. The text splashed across the poster reads “60 YEARS OF HEROES!”. Did someone lower the bar on what quantifies a ...

Tags: This Stepford Life, Heritage Minute, Heroes, Morgentaler, Rants, Soapboxing

Kimli ― 6 days ago

superstition

superstition

Delicious Juice Dot Com ― By this time next week, Ed and I were supposed to be halfway through Oregon and marvelling at the wonders along Route 101. We had planned to drive through Washington, then take Route 101 south to California and spend a couple of days in San ...

Tags: This Stepford Life, Adventure, Birthday, Boo, Cancelation, Superstition

Kimli ― 1 week 3 days ago

backfired

backfired

Delicious Juice Dot Com ― People don’t take me seriously very often, with good reason: I am rarely serious. Nearly everything I say is tongue-in-cheek. Even things that have basis in reality and/or are Serious Times are usually made for the funny: I use exaggeration ...

Tags: This Stepford Life, Backfired, I Am A Bad Person, In-jokes, Oops, Zombies

Kimli ― 1 week 5 days ago

opt out

opt out

Delicious Juice Dot Com ― There needs to be a universal “opt out” clause for things you don’t want to be reminded about. I say this for every person who’s ever lost a parent, or has a dysfunctional relationship with them, or hell even has horrible...

Tags: This Stepford Life, Dad, Father's Day, Loss, Mysterious Death, Spam

Kimli ― 1 week 6 days ago

good news, everyone

good news, everyone

Delicious Juice Dot Com ― Many weeks ago I alluded to some Big Changes coming at work; changes that would either make me sad and frustrated or happy-ish but faking competency. I am pleased to announce that the information embargo has kind of been lifted*, and I now know ...

Tags: This Stepford Life, Goose, Hooray, Promotion, Turtles, Vancouver

Kimli ― 2 weeks 2 days ago

you can’t take the sky from me

Delicious Juice Dot Com ― Listen up, Vancouver: I know it’s May 29th and the weather kind of sucks. It’s a Wednesday, which is usually the worst day of the week what with the no end in sight. Maybe you slept poorly, or you missed your bus, or your boss has been...

Tags: This Stepford Life, Get The Stick Out Of Your Ass Please, Grumpy People, Vancouver, Wednesday Blues

Kimli ― 3 weeks ago

wardrobe malfunction

wardrobe malfunction

Delicious Juice Dot Com ― My zipper broke at work today. I’m wearing a dress, as usual, and the zipper (which I never use; I just pull the dress over my head) decided it was done with life and split right in the middle. I tried to fix it, but the damage was ...

Tags: This Stepford Life

Kimli ― 3 weeks 1 day ago

16309

Delicious Juice Dot Com ― This never fails to make me laugh: Even more, now that I’ve seen the new Star Trek movie (which I enjoyed, even though the destruction of San Francisco is really going to fuck up our vacation plans .. again). This week: exciting news, for ...

Tags: This Stepford Life

Kimli ― 3 weeks 2 days ago

coast clear

Delicious Juice Dot Com ― Ed’s appointment with the doctor was almost anti-climatic: they found nothing. The doctor theorized that Ed’s body was fighting off a Mega Infection by being a bit of a dick, so reinforcements in the form of antibiotics ought to turn ...

Tags: This Stepford Life

Kimli ― 3 weeks 5 days ago

using my words

Delicious Juice Dot Com ― At this particular moment in time, I’m more scared than I can ever remember being. Ed is sick. He’s been sick for a while now. What started out as a cold lingered, turned into bronchitis, then the flu. He’s had a rattle in his ...

Tags: This Stepford Life, Comforting, Fear, Health Scare, Horrible Person, Losing It

Kimli ― 3 weeks 6 days ago

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